Save Joe!

Oh noes! The Bidens are having their "getting to know you" lunch with the Cheneys. Don't worry, Joe, we all know where you are and if you do not emerge by late this afternoon we will send help! Be sure to cover your face and DUCK.

Kiss Me, We're Irish!

This is a song my J Ape sent me:

No One's as Irish as Barack O'Bama:



Bwah! Check out this sign in Moneygall, where O'Bama's great-great-great-grampy came from:

From le BBC.

My Stories!

This week was a great week all around. And The Colbert Report was FAN-TAS-TIC. I tried to fit in an alliterative adjective but it was censored by my editor. So I give you two great interviews.

Thursday night Rachel Maddow was on! It's like two of my favoritest people EVER in ONE PLACE! (And if Malia and Sasha can't adopt me Rachel is my backup plan):




And here is Stephen with Andrew Young, a civil rights pioneer. Watch as Stephen makes him crack up and then watch as he makes Stephen crack up!

Mutt Like Me!

In a press conference today Obama addressed a number of very important policy questions, in particular the puppy situation in his home and he said this:

"On the other hand, our preference would be to get a shelter dog. But obviously a lot of shelter dogs are mutts, like me."

I think that the obvious solution is that a President who is one of a kind should have a dog who is one of a kind:

CORGADOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

Feelin' a Bit More Blue

You know how excited I was by Blue Florida? And Blue North Carolina--that state that repeatedly elected Jesse Helms? And Blue Virginia. Ok, well this trumps 'em all. After recounting the votes, adding in provisional and absentee ballots, Obama took one of Nebraska's electoral college votes--the first time in 40 years a Dem has won in NE! (For those of you fortunate enough to not live with a political science dork, Nebraska is one of two states to divide up its electoral college vote by Congressional District.) So my GranNE no longer lives in a Red State! She was part of parting the Red Sea!

Road to the Dog House

Jon Stewart doesn't even know I have already won the race:

Best Headline

From the Onion: "Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job."

As part of his duties, the black man will have to spend four to eight years cleaning up the messes other people left behind. The job comes with such intense scrutiny and so certain a guarantee of failure that only one other person even bothered applying for it. Said scholar and activist Mark L. Denton, "It just goes to show you that, in this country, a black man still can't catch a break."

See also: "Nation Finally Shitty Enough to Make Social Progress."

Barney Goes Rogue!

This just in! Barney the White House Scottie has bitten a Reuters reporter (this was Breaking News on MSNBC--no joke!) and the reporter had to go to the hospital?

Is Barney PO'd that his legacy will always be tied to the Bush Epic Fail? Or his he mad about this story about how the Obama girls' hypothetical dog is more interesting to the public than he is? Or maybe he just doesn't want to go back to Texas with those yahoos? Free Barney!

ETA: Video of the incident!

The Transition

The Times has a story today about the most important issue of staffing in the transitional period for the Obamas. Picking their daughters' dog! DailyKos has been doing polls, the AKC is trying to convince them to go purebred, the Humane Society is pushing adoption. Right now CBS is doing a story on puppies to help the Obamas make a choice.

Guys, guys. Done and done. I'm RIGHT HERE!

(P.S. Thanks to Alice who sent me this story and who regularly comments IRL on my irresistible cuteness and yesterday referred to me as the essence of nobility. I will be using her as a reference for my White House gig.)

An Historic Day

Hello. I am very tired. Yesterday my ma ape drove folks to the polls and then she was going to take coffee and donuts to the people waiting in line and she decided to give them the greaterest gift of all--ME! I helped hand out donuts AND I helped to eat them. That is socialism I can believe in!

While I have been resting I have been reading the intertubes and I would like to give big kissy smoochies (see above) to Massachusetts for banning greyhound racing. Ha-rooooo! And California passed Prop 2 which restricts some of the worst factory farming techniques.

But I must also blow raspberries (also see above) at California for passing Prop 8 (aka Prop 8) which amends CA's constitution to ban gay marriage. Way to HARSH OUR VIBE, DUDES!

To recap, here are my favorite things from yesterday:

• my new moms Malia and Sasha got their dad (my gramps!) to promise them a puppy when they move to the White House
• DONUTS
• BLUE FLORIDA! (Shout out to the Barkalot Boyz!)
  
• Free Greyhounds
• Staying up late with Stephen Colbert
• No more Joe the Plumber
• Blue Colorado!