Pandering to Joe

So last night's debate was unpleasant, eh?

But there was an interesting development, the endless appeals to the mysterious "Joe." But I know who they're talking about and the one vote everyone wants.

I'm sure he'll have to inspect their respective stains first, but I know that Joe's endorsement will seal the deal on this election.

Though I'm a bit confused. Are we talking about Joe Six-Pack or Joe Plumber? Or does Joe take his Six-Pack with him while Plumbing?

Can I call ya Joe?

Thank you Gus for making my ma ape fall off the couch laughing with this wonderful clip from SNL:



And thank you, Tina Fey, for perfectly capturing the most absurd persona in American politics ever.

Like Lincoln-Douglas!

Tonight's debate will be like Lincoln-Douglas. If Stephen Douglas had been a kinda sleazy guy with unclear positions on some of the most important issues of his day who made his money by marrying rich and who deployed racist rhetoric in his campaign and worried about looking ridiculously short next to his lean, lanky and long opponent. Oh wait!

McSame has been doing what some in the media call "Hail Mary" plays--like when the team that is behind is desperate and just heaves the ball at the end one and hopes their team catches. Surprise! I'm going to nominate a completely unexpected (because she is completely unqualified!) Veep! Surprise! I'm suspending the campaign! (Except for the advertising, appearance, interview and fundraising bits.)

And now on Slate they have some suggestions for McSame's next Hail Mary!

1. Returns to Vietnam and jails himself.

2. Offers the post of "vice vice president" to Warren Buffett.

3. Challenges Obama to suspend campaign so they both can go and personally drill for oil offshore.

4. Learns to use computer.

5. Does bombing run over Taliban-controlled tribal areas of Pakistan.

6. Offers to forgo salary, sell one house.

7. Sex-change operation.

8. Suspends campaign until Nov. 4, offers to start being president right now.

9. Sells Alaska to Russia for $700 billion.

10. Pledges to serve only one term. OK, half a term.

Thanks to Gus and his Muzzer for the link to the funny picture and their hearty sense of humor.

It's ON!

As you may have heard, McCain has lowered himself to debate tonight. Now that he has saved the universe from sure collapse he will swoop into Mississippi to show his rhetorical mastery!



I have been ordered to avoid any mention of my own skills as a master debator so I'm just going to say--GO GET 'EM BARACK!