Sarah Palin for Chief Justice!

So apparently Sarah Palin is not only a master of foreign policy, living in proximity to Russia and having met a couple of world leaders, but she is also a prominent legal scholar! Leaked reports of the yet unreleased CBS interview say:

The Palin aide, after first noting how "infuriating" it was for CBS to purportedly leak word about the gaffe, revealed that it came in response to a question about Supreme Court decisions.

After noting Roe vs. Wade, Palin was apparently unable to discuss any major court cases.

There was no verbal fumbling with this particular question as there was with some others, the aide said, but rather silence.

P.S. Sadly, the video is a parody. The text is not. Truth, scarier than fiction!

Needed: More Maverickliciousness

So I don't know what to make of this bailout business, especially now that it has collapsed.

But if McCain's BOLD campaign "suspension" did not save the day it is time for new Maverick Moves! How 'bout he suspends time itself! Yes! Be cryogenically frozen and await--in suspended animation--until the polls change!

I have to agree with Paul Krugman here.

So what we now have is non-functional government in the face of a major crisis, because Congress includes a quorum of crazies and nobody trusts the White House an inch.
As a friend said last night, we’ve become a banana republic with nukes.

Like Lincoln-Douglas!

Tonight's debate will be like Lincoln-Douglas. If Stephen Douglas had been a kinda sleazy guy with unclear positions on some of the most important issues of his day who made his money by marrying rich and who deployed racist rhetoric in his campaign and worried about looking ridiculously short next to his lean, lanky and long opponent. Oh wait!

McSame has been doing what some in the media call "Hail Mary" plays--like when the team that is behind is desperate and just heaves the ball at the end one and hopes their team catches. Surprise! I'm going to nominate a completely unexpected (because she is completely unqualified!) Veep! Surprise! I'm suspending the campaign! (Except for the advertising, appearance, interview and fundraising bits.)

And now on Slate they have some suggestions for McSame's next Hail Mary!

1. Returns to Vietnam and jails himself.

2. Offers the post of "vice vice president" to Warren Buffett.

3. Challenges Obama to suspend campaign so they both can go and personally drill for oil offshore.

4. Learns to use computer.

5. Does bombing run over Taliban-controlled tribal areas of Pakistan.

6. Offers to forgo salary, sell one house.

7. Sex-change operation.

8. Suspends campaign until Nov. 4, offers to start being president right now.

9. Sells Alaska to Russia for $700 billion.

10. Pledges to serve only one term. OK, half a term.

Thanks to Gus and his Muzzer for the link to the funny picture and their hearty sense of humor.

It's ON!

As you may have heard, McCain has lowered himself to debate tonight. Now that he has saved the universe from sure collapse he will swoop into Mississippi to show his rhetorical mastery!



I have been ordered to avoid any mention of my own skills as a master debator so I'm just going to say--GO GET 'EM BARACK!

It's Debatin' Time

Maybe if John McSame decides he doesn't want to debate--or more likely that he wants to debate when Sarah Palin was supposed to debate Delaware Joe because whew was that interview with Palin and Katie Couric embarrassing--maybe Obama should go it alone! Like Stephen Colbert's Formidable Opponent! Or instead of a debate Obama could have a dance-off with Stephen like he had with Rain! (Though he might want to have Michelle dance for him. I saw them both on Ellen and Obama dances like he has a mom from Kansas).

Here's more funny, courtesy of David Letterman. McSame blew him off yesterday for a last minute interview with Couric that bumped off most of Palin's embarrassing inability to answer basic questions. Dave is not pleased:

Paw-litical Satire

From the Internets. Our guv-mint is a 419 scam!

> Dear American:
> I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business
> relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.
> I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America.
> My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large
> transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would
> assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to
> you.
> I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will
> be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As
> a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American
> banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transactin
> is 100% safe.
> This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check.
> We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly
> transfer these funds in the names of our close friends
> because we are constantly under surveillance. My family
> lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and
> trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the
> funds can be transferred.
> Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college
> fund account numbers and those of your children and
> grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we
> may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I
> receive that information, I will respond with detailed
> information about safeguards that will be used to protect
> the funds.
> Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson

The Smell of Fear

moar funny pictures

Hey! Look! It's the Obama list of things that need to be addressed in the gazillion dollar bailout of Wall Street including things like more transparency and greater guarantees that taxpayer money will be returned. The Washington Monthly has noted that the McCain proposal, issued 48 hours later, looks suspiciously similar! Dude, my ma ape has a strict policy on plagiarism and believes that unrepentant lying plagiarizers belong in the ninth circle of Dante's Inferno. Oh, and you know what the ring for traitors is called? Cain. I'm just sayin'.

And, curiously, McSame now doesn't want to debate on Friday.

Dogs can smell fear. I'm just sayin'.

Rachel Explains it All

Rachel Maddow explains the stupidity of the Bush admin's planned bailout of the financial system:



And I'm hungry for candy and my own bailout.

Feeling Nostalgic!

This near meltdown of our financial system and proposed Bush disaster of a bailout plan reminds me of an oldy but goody financial scandal of the late 1980s also brought to you by deregulation! The S&L scandal! And WHO was at the center of that, an infamous member of the Keating Five? Why Mr. Maverick himself, John McSame!



As John at TPM reminds us:

Let's face it. On major economy-imperiling financial scandals brought about by lax regulation and help from lobbyist-encrusted politicians, McCain really is the candidate of experience.

Alaskans for Obama!

Thanks to my GranNE and the Newfs of Hazard who told me about the rally against Palin in Anchorage where several thousand people showed up to show their support for Obama.

All the News Fit to Watch!

Hey! I'm like a fuzzy TiVo. Here's some great stuff from the TeeVee:

Rachel Maddow on The Women's Vote and why women might care more that--while Palin was mayor--Wasilla, AK charged women for their own rape kits than the fact that some uber-rich woman endorsed McSame:



Stephen Colbert spreads dirty lies about McCain because he won't come on the show:



Stephen explains why we haven't caught Bin Laden:

More of the Same, the Big Brain Edition!

Oh how we shall miss the wit and wisdom of our forty-third President. Witness:


"I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office."—Washington, D.C., June 26, 2008Full list of Bushisms here.

Remember before the 2004 debates when a Bush aide compared John Kerry's mad debating skillz to Cicero? It did a fine job of raising expectations for JK, lowering them for the President who sounds like Larry the Cable Guy. (Also remember the mysterious lump on Bush's back--look for one on Palin. I'm just sayin'). Same thing is happening with Palin. This morning on the news they seemed to indicate that so long as she does not wet herself or think the Bush Doctrine has to do with clearing brush in Crawford, she's going to win!

Well, I have some bad news for you. She might be the brains of the operation. In an interview with Spanish language radio, John McCain appears to believe that either 1) Spain is a part of the axis of evil 2) That Spain is in Latin America or 3) he has no idea who this Zapatero fellow is but he sounds like a villain from a Zorro movie.

Ready on day one, are we?

Rachel Rocks the Rating!

Rachel Maddow's show on MSNBC is now their highest rated show!!! It's cool when smart people do well.

Here she is countin' the lies at the GOP:



I think Rachel might be my long lost sister because we are both whip smart.

Bringin' Home the Bacon!

This is what a feminist looks like!

I'm a strong advocate of equal pay for equal work because I need my ma ape to bring home the bacon! (Literally--ma ape, we haven't had bacon in months!) John McCain supports it in theory just not, you know, it a legally enforceable way.

You know who does support it? Michelle Obama and her husband who, you may have heard, is running to be the Prez. You can read Michelle's bloggy post on the Obama equality platform She blogs just like me! But with less f'n profanity and fewer gratuitous photos of herself being unbearably cute.

It's the Economy, Stupid Liar!

Back and Better Than Ever!

Hey! Elizabeth Edwards is going to be in my neighborhood talking about Health Care!

And Bob Herbert has a nice column on the health care plan of John McCain which is not so much a health care plan but a health care crisis in the making:

These are changes that will set in motion nothing less than the dismantling of the employer-based coverage that protects most American families.

A study coming out Tuesday from scholars at Columbia, Harvard, Purdue and Michigan projects that 20 million Americans who have employment-based health insurance would lose it under the McCain plan.

There is nothing secret about Senator McCain’s far-reaching proposals, but they haven’t gotten much attention because the chatter in this campaign has mostly been about nonsense — lipstick, celebrities and “Drill, baby, drill!”

Biting Back!

What's the difference between the Obama campaign and this corgador? The Obama campaign has more teeth in its bite!



(Malia--I still want to become an Obama and live in the White House--adopt me!)

Some Pigs Lie, Some Pigs Fly

My girl Narra sent me this.


And my GranNE sent me this blog post from the Washington Monthly. If Faux News thinks you're a bunch of Lying McLiars who Lie like Rugs, you're REALLY lying!

EVEN FOX NEWS.... I guess we've reached a tipping point. This morning, Fox News' Megyn Kelly was downright indignant, on the air, about the McCain campaign's dishonesty. Yes, I was surprised, too.

McCain campaign spokesman Tucker Bounds, as is his habit, started lying about Barack Obama's tax plan. Much to my surprise -- and Bounds' -- Kelly interrupted, and said Obama wouldn't raise taxes on middle-class families.

Bounds pushed back, but Kelly pressed further: "[Y]ou guys have suggested he's going to raise taxes on the middle class and virtually every independent analyst who took a look at that claim said that's not true. He'll raise it on people making $200,000 or $250,000, but not the middle class."

When Bounds said Kelly was giving Obama a lot of credit, she replied, "I'm not giving him any credit. I'm saying what the independent analysts say. They say that claim is false. And if that's false, why would John McCain do that, Tucker? ... [W]hy say he's going to raise taxes on the middle class when he's not?"

His back against the wall, Bounds justified his bogus claims by arguing that Obama voted to raise taxes in the Senate 94 times (which is false), and saying Obama wanted to raise taxes on those making $42,000 a year (which is also false).

It's consistent with the pattern established by the McCain campaign -- caught in a lie, utilize additional lies.

Stepping back, though, Bounds probably never expected Megyn Kelly to confront him with reality, or to call him out on his mendacity. If the McCain campaign's dishonesty is even turning off Fox News, the "McCain lies a lot" narrative may be taking root after all.

—Steve Benen 11:15 AM Permalink | Trackbacks | Comments (20)



But Faux News criticizing a Republican't? Watch for flying pigs!

Sunday Funny!

Ohmydog I have to show you the most awesome thing EVER!

Look!
My friend Alice got my ma ape something VERY FUNNY for her burpday last month. It is a Bobblefoot! Alice--in between searching for the plane that Sarah Palin put on eBay but did not actually sell--located and bought this COLLECTOR'S ITEM that was given out at a St. Paul Saints game.

Congratulations to Senator Larry Craig, your wide stance will truly live in infamy.

MORE Friday Funnies!

It is FUN to laugh at the McSame campaign!

Friday Funny

The caption says: Awaiting Inspiration.

Sancha Barks!

A fellow barker (and fellow corgi mix!) Sancha went to the forum on service attended by the candidates at Columbia Uni. Sancha has a very good review here. Sancha's impressions: College students love Obama almost as much as they love dogs! Maybe kids these days aren't so bad!

This picture is neither of Sancha nor is it from last night. I just liked it. And I'm still waiting for the Obama girls to adopt me. Corgi mixes have your back!!!!!!

Bloggy Roundup

Here are some things I read today that made my head spin:

Disappearing Dubya: The absence of Bush at the GOP convention was glaringly obvious, though unremarked upon by the media, perhaps because he is also a symbol of their failure:

But if McCain did pull off the great escape, it was only thanks to the press and the way eager journalists pitched in to erase Bush from the political picture.

And here's why: The press is just as anxious as McCain to have Bush go away. The press is just as anxious as McCain to forget about the failures of the last eight years. Why? Because the press, like McCain, is partly to blame for Bush's White House misadventure.

Untruth in advertising: Factcheck.org has a nice rundown of the lie-ridden ads of the McCain campaign including the "belittling Palin" ad, the "Obama is a wolf hunting Palin" ad and the "Obama wants to molest kindergartner ads." Surprise! All included falsehoods!

Say WHAT? Dana Perino, White House Spokesrobot, says that the fact that we haven't caught Bin Laden is no biggie because he really wasn't the mastermind behind 9/11 anyway.

A Good Idea in Theory... According to one of his spokespersons, John McCain supports equal pay for equal work, he just never votes for it!

That is How We Roll!

John McCain got SHUT DOWN in his first appearance without Palin:

After lunching with a roundtable of women at Philadelphia’s Down Home Diner, McCain shook hands with supporters and strode up to a podium to deliver a statement. But as he spoke, chants of “Obama, Obama, Obama” filled the room.

Philly in the House!

What do you expect when you campaign on the idea that small town folk are real, upstanding moral folk and urbanites are dumb snooty cosmopolitans? I mean, my ma ape is a small town broad and she was offended!

Can't stand the heat, get outta the City of Brotherly Love!

Stop the Blogs!

We cannot discuss how the U.S. can most safely disengage in Iraq, how the bailout of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac reflects on the economy and U.S borrowing from China.

NO! We must not talk about these things until we resolve the most vital issue of the day: does John Kerry look funny windsurfing? did Obama call Palin a pig???!!!??

Change!

For those of you thrilled by the ins and outs of local First State pawlitics--the good guy won in the Delaware Democratic Governor's primary! It's a long story but the victory of Jack Markell bucked the party hierarchy and nominated the more progressive candidate.

It's especially important because when Joe Biden becomes VP the guv will have to appoint a temporary Senator until a special election can be held.

Truth in Advertising!

You might have seen this klassy ad from the McCain camp about Obama and sex education:



The vote they are referring to actually added information about STIs to existing programs for high schoolers. And the program that is referred to as "sex education for kindergartners" is actually teaching kids "good touch/bad touch," teaching kids that it is against the law for older people to exploit them.

So my question is. Why does John McCain want our kids to be sexually exploited?

UR Doin It Wrong

That could just be the slogan of the GOP, eh? Visitor K gave me a link to this photo:


Oh you elitist liberals with your SPELLING and GRAMMAR.

Must See Tee Vee!

Tonight! The Rachel Maddow Show debuts on MSNBC at 9 pm!


Granny--if Nebraska football was not enough to make you get cable maybe this will be! Ditch the antennae and get you 156 channels of crap! (Plus five hours of Rachel/week).

Yes He Can (and Has)

Look at me! I am hope-y!

I found this nice run-down of Obama's accomplishments as a legislator. I know it's a lot more fun to just mock community organizers--you know, those stupid people who try to help other people improve their lives--but it doesn't take much time on the Google to find that Obama has a fair number of accomplishments in the four years he's been in the Senate in addition to things he's done at the state and local level.

And also, community organizers rule.

Maverick-y!

I know I'm posting a lot of Daily Show but sometimes the fake journalists do a better job than the pros:



(My apologies to my Canadian friends who are unable to watch from their socialist haven.)

New Boss, Same as the Old Boss

Biden with Bark and Bite!

Here's Joe Biden in PA talking about job loss, the economy, and how taking pot shots and community organizers, questioning other peoples' patriotism, and whining about the media is not going to help those in need. This guy's got a little of the Joe Cool that Joe Stains has:



Hey--it was a McCain operative who said "It's not about the issues..."

Here's Joe rootin' for my hometown team:

Fightin' Blue Hens!

This Dog Won't Hunt

My fellow barkers Sam and Leah have sent me this link to a video from the Defenders of Wildlife Action Fund on Palin's record on aerial hunting of bears and wolves. I am embedding this video even though I had to turn away from it after seeing what was happening to my fellow canines.




They have a page listing her record on the environment. She loves her some drilling, still questions whether humans contribute to global warming, and has used state funds to oppose measures against aerial hunting.

That's NOT the change we need.

And, frankly, a polar bear would make a better Vice President.

The Scene in St Paul

Ike went to shout at the Republican'ts who invaded his hometown. He got see Eugene Robinson and he took this picture:

First, I like that the stars on the GOP banner makes it look like the elephant is passing gas. But I don't blame him for having indigestion since the Faux News Tent is attached to the convention like a giant, cancerous tumor. Not unlike in real life.

But this week we've had all bad news so here's some hope-i-ness from Ike.


Why is he smiling? He can't wait to Bark for President Barack!

Questioning Patriotism?

I guess I shouldn't be surprised, given that in 2004 GOP conventioneers--supporting a President and VP with no military experience--mocked veteran John Kerry with fake purple heart bandaids. But the GOP produced a video celebrating patriotism and the service of our soldiers. With no actual soldiers. They were actors.

It was a video that was supposed to elicit soaring patriotism and real emotions about the Pledge of Allegiance. But to do that, it used fake soldiers and a staged military funeral instead of the real thing.

And then there's this. Do you know what this is in the background behind McSame?


That's Walter Reed Middle School.

Who knew the Republican'ts were so good at metaphor?

Smartness. U R Doing It Rong.

Curious Image of the Day

From CNN, via Pam's House Blend:



On an unrelated note, here's a story about how the Republicans have made--in the words of Jon Stewart--Minnesota even whiter. And they puzzle over the lack of diversity in their party. I'm sure this has nothin' to do with it.

We Interrupt this Blog...

On Wednesday night in her speech Governor Palin got some (GOP) laughs with the line "What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick." Here with a response is my friend Big Red, an inmate at the SPCA.


Dear Governor Palin,

I know pit bulls. Some of my best friends (me) are pit bulls. You, my friend, are no pit bull.

Sincerely,

Big Red
President and Vice President
Pitty Anti-Defamation Society (PADS)

P.S. I do look darn fetching in lipstick.
P.P.S. Please stop smearing pit bulls. We have it tough enough without being compared to Republicans.

Call and Response

moar funny pictures

So...many Democrats have noted how the "elitism" argument leveled at the Obamas is thinly veiled racism, a code for "uppity" which has long been used to describe African-Americans who do not know their "place" (ie, who dare to ask to be treated like human beings).

The veil is officially off.

Representative Lynn Westmoreland (R-GA) said:

"Just from what little I’ve seen of her and Mr. Obama, Sen. Obama, they're a member of an elitist-class individual that thinks that they're uppity," Westmoreland said.

Asked to clarify that he used the word “uppity,” Westmoreland said, “Uppity, yeah.”

The response from the Obama campaign rocks: “Sounds like Rep. Westmoreland should be careful throwing stones from his candidate's eight glass houses,” said Obama spokesman Tommy Vietor.

Dispatches from St. Paul

moar funny pictures

My friend Annabelle is three and a half and lives in St. Paul. She had the most insightful bit of political punditry I heard today. This is what she wrote me:

ohkh9jhjnh,lhni9jhh,hkig,,oogi0yhn098y09hy8jonihikhuyiy80uyuyht86u7ybh

Seriously--far more sensible than Morning Joe on MSNBC today. Our Teevee nearly went out the window.

Annabelle's very smart mom also gave us this link to the NPR Minnesota blog which is a highly recommended read. It has some interesting information on the protests. Ike also has some good pictures and stories.

The NPR blog notes parallels with the '68 Democratic convention, though no one seems to be taking the protestors seriously as anything other than rabble rousers (and the infamous "anarchist" labels--more on the so-called "angry left" later!) But my favorite story was this one about the longest line in town--the one to see The Daily Show on location!

The Daily Show might argue, however, that there's quite a line for men's room at the Minneapolis Airport. Paging Senator Craig!!!

Hypocrites on Parade!

Jon Stewart knows hypocrisy when he sees it!



And this is just funny. And sort of telling.

Oops!

Two Republican toadies pundits on MSNBC got caught with their mics on:




Earlier this week Peggy Noonan wrote an editorial in WSJ about how Sarah Palin will save America. Here's what she says when she thinks no one's listening:

Noonan: The most qualified? No. I think they went for this, excuse me, political bullshit about "narratives" and youthfulness and the picture...

In Case you were Wondering...

Curious as to why McCain would pick someone he had met exactly once to be the next in line as leader of the free world? Ahem. Max Blumenthal is reporting that the "Council on National Policy," a secretive rightwingnuttery that includes Grover Norquist, James Dobson, and Tony Perkins picked Palin and threatened a convention meltdown if McSame went with his choice--Joe Lieberman.

And the news is reporting that the GOP has adopted its abortion platform, reaffirming, no abortion EVER--not in cases of rape, incest, or to protect the life/health of the mother. Pro-life indeed!

ST. PAUL, Minn. (AP) — Republicans rebuffed their certain nominee Monday by endorsing a platform that goes further than John McCain in opposition to abortion rights.

Yet in a pair of back-to-back votes on the opening day of their national convention, the 2,400 delegates yielded to McCain's desire to keep New Hampshire's presidential primary first in the nation.

Republican National Chairman Robert "Mike" Duncan used a quick gavel to adopt a platform unconditionally declaring the party's opposition to abortion. His resounding crack of the gavel overshadowed shouts of "no" when Duncan made a perfunctory call for objections.

The GOP document, which is nonbinding, does not provide exceptions allowing abortion in cases of rape, incest or where a mother's life would be in danger — all favored by McCain. The Arizona senator's running mate, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, opposes abortion in all cases, consistent with the platform.

As The Nation said, It's Palin's Party, not McCains. Not so mavericky now, eh? If you can't stand up to religious extremists at home....

Same Old Tune

So last Thursday we made history with the first-ever African-American nominee of a major party giving a really kick-bum speech laying out plans for what we need to do for the country.

On Monday a major hurricane hit the Gulf Coast and two more are looming in the Atlantic, reminding us of the problems with our emergency response systems.

And today we are talking about moose burgers, a 17-year old, and the finer points of politics in Wasilla, Alaska. Well played, Karl Rovians! Bob Herbert comments on this today:

Here’s the deal: Palin is the latest G.O.P. distraction. She’s meant to shift attention away from the real issue of this campaign — the awful state of the nation after eight years of Republican rule. The Republicans are brilliant at distractions. Willie Horton was a distraction. The chatter about gays, guns and God has been a long-running distraction. And we all remember the Swift-boat campaign.

But I'm still thinking about this...

Sending Help

I just got e-mail from my friend Barack (seriously, he addresses it "Dear Wally") asking to help out the Red Cross/first responders in the gulf. Here's the link.

Happy Labor Day!

It is the first day of the GOP Convention AND Labor Day.

Irony has landed in the Twin Cities.
Have a good one! (Even my friends who live in those places that celebrate labor day in May because they are commie pinkos. Just kidding!)